Fashion Faux Pas

I am by no means a fashion-forward person, but i'm at least fashion-conscious. I applaud those who dress for themselves rather than to impress others. What I don't understand are those people who try to follow the latest fashion "trends" even though they look hideous. Individuality is one thing. Mindless fashion cloning is another.

Let's start with the leggings. They look ridiculous! It didn't look good in the 80's and it doesn't look good now. Stop the madness and toss them into the dumpster where they belong. I mean really, footless skin-tight colored fabric? Never a good idea. Speaking of skin-tight, guys need to stop wearing pants that look as if they'd been painted on. No one needs to see the goods. Put the franks and beans away please.

Oh and there's the ever-popular "wife beater". Girls can pull it off if they accessorize properly. Guys should never ever wear this as their only shirt. Cover it up. That's why it's called an UNDERshirt. We don't need to smell your rank underarm odor nor do we need to see the hair all over your body. Tuck it in people. The worst is when the guys think big gold chains on top of these shirts looks good. You want to know what the girls are really thinking? "Avoid at all costs."

We can't forget men's speedos, affectionately known as Banana Hammocks. My only question is WHY????? There's no room to breathe. It's all scrunched up in an area that is way too small. It looks horrific. Unless you're an olympic swimmer, please buy trunks instead.

Now we'll move onto the styles that people unintentionally (I hope) wear. Let's begin with the ever-popular Muffin Top. You all know what this looks like. It's a girl with a little extra pudge around her waist who wears a shirt that's too small and follows up with pants that are too tight. The final package is a person who's excess flab rolls OVER the top of the pants on all sides that looks very similar to the top of a muffin. Ladies, tighter does not always mean better. Hide the flaws, don't showcase them! I mean, sure I could easily have muffin top since I'm not the slimmest of creatures. However, I know better than to let it all out there for people to gawk at. It's not attractive nor will it ever be.

Then there's Camel Toe. I like to call it CT for short. It's when a girl hikes up her pants so high that the crotch area ends up resembling a camel's hoof. You all know you've seen it. First of all, how comfortable can that possibly be? Secondly, don't you have friends or family that love you enough to tell you that you look foolish?

Final Thoughts: There are some fashion trends that should never have happened and it's unfortunate that they get recycled through the decades. There's no need to dress like the superstars because unless you have the same body-type, you're more than likely going to look like an idiot. Dress to complement your own body, not that of a mannequin. Lastly, invest in a full-length mirror. It works wonders.

Things on My Mind

What's up with office thievery? I got into work today and my area looked just like how it did when I left last night. As I was settling in, I noticed a very familiar item sitting on top of the supply cabinet behind me. It was my container of Clorox wipes that usually sits next to my monitor on my desk. First question is, why would someone take it from my desk and not put it back? Second question is, why would they need to nearly empty the container? Is their desk THAT filthy? I find it strange that people do things like this. I'd be more than willing to let people use them, just ask first. I'm tempted to put a label on it that says "Ask First You Sneaky Piece of Shit". I won't though because that wouldn't go over too well with the bosses. It's a bit offensive, no?

So I went to the grocery store with Him yesterday since it was time to restock. He's been guilt-tripping me lately about not making him lunches to bring to work because his co-worker's fiance does it for him. So I decided I'd stop in the deli section and buy some sandwich goodies for him. The deli guy either really loved his job, or he was bored beyond belief. He was so happy to slice some turkey and ham for me. It's like I gave him a present or something. Plus, he gave me free slices to eat while I waited so by the time he was done with my order, I was full. He also made a really corny joke when I asked him for honey ham. Him: You want honey ham? Me: Yes, honey ham please. Him: Honey? Okay honey! Me: umm, ha ha ha.

My foot started hurting for no apparent reason on Sunday after my bridal shower. I was standing there deciding which boxes I could fit into my car and then I got a shooting pain in my right foot. I had no idea what was going on. By the time we packed up the presents and got back to our place, I could hardly walk. I had to slowly make my way up the three flights of steps. As the evening passed, the pain was getting steadily worse. By the time I was in bed, I had to literally crawl from the bed to the bathroom. Yesterday I was still limping, but today I'm not. It hurts if I turn it weird or step on it funny, but all in all it seems like it's improving. I don't know what caused it. Is this some psychosomatic bullshit? He says there's always something wrong with me and you know what? He's right. Maybe I'm just a hypochondriac.

They Got Me!

I was ready for this weekend to be pretty uneventful with a couple of engagements here and there to pass the time. I went home yesterday afternoon expecting to lunch with the family to celebrate dad's birthday. Then, lo and behold, who do I see when I opened the front door? About 30 of my closest friends smiling at me and yelling "surprise!" It was my bridal shower!

Although it was a surprise shower, I must admit that I did have a clue that it was happening when I got ready yesterday morning. I got up and was about to put my hair in a ponytail and change into sweats for lunch. He told me to shower. I said I was going to go to the gym after lunch so I'd shower afterwards. He insisted that I shower and said, "what if you stay at the house longer than expected?" That was my first clue. So, I hopped into the shower and spent at least 20 minutes trying to figure out what to wear "just in case" today happened to be the day. I also touched up the face with a bit of make-up to make sure I didn't look all splotchy-faced for the (possible) pictures that would be taken. As we drove home, He made a phone call and said it was to F to say that softball practice had been cancelled. I was pretty sure that he was making the secret call to say I was on my way home. I couldn't be sure though. When I opened the door and heard the "surprise" echoing through the house, I was so touched. Everyone tried to keep it a secret from me and He was so adorable for playing along. Although it wasn't 100% of a surprise, it was pretty crazy seeing all my friends in one place, and having that place be my parents' house.

There was tons of food laid out and a mountain of Crate and Barrel boxes in the living room. Mom put her creativity to use and filled the house with balloon flowers and balloon lovebirds. L, N, and C hosted the games and put me in a few embarrassing situations! It was all in good fun though. My brother was there as the videographer and I'm sure there were moments when he wished he wasn't there.

N made some badass sangria and I actually packed up what was left to take home. I mean, why waste it, right? C had no shame and gave me the most inappropriate shower gift. This one definitely belonged at the bachelorette instead. I had my mom, grandma, two aunts, and a little cousin in the room! All I'll say about the gift is "hoppity hop hop hop" since that's what she put on the gift list next to her name. If you can figure out what the gift was, then you're just as perverted as she is hahaha.

L, my big sis and maid of honor, pulled off a great shower and her anal-retentiveness is always welcome when it comes to organizing and planning things. If it wasn't for her, my wedding probably wouldn't even be half-planned right now. She did a great job with the games, food, and guests.

As I'm writing this, I can't believe my bridal shower is done and over with. It happened so fast and it was so unexpected. I had such a great time and I'm so glad so many of my friends took time out of their busy schedules to join me in the festivities. I'm a very happy bride-to-be right now:o)

Shallow Me

I've been wasting time lately browsing Friendster and Myspace for old schoolmates. He calls me nosy, which I am, but that's what these sites are for, right? It's interesting to see what people look like now and to read about what their lives are like. I went to a huge high school and it was very easy to feel invisible. Although I wasn't the "loser" with no friends, I definitely wasn't the life of the party either. Adolescence is such an awkward time in life and I would never re-live those years. I was always in awe of the classmates that seemed so comfortable with who they were. Looking back, I'm sure they felt just as self-conscious about themselves as I did. They just hid it better. There were those guys that everyone liked and the girls that everyone wanted to be.Their attractiveness was skewed because of this popularity factor and they seemed like the most beautiful people in the world. They seemed like they had everything in life. They had the money, the clothes, the run of the school, the cars, and friends galore. I felt like I was living in a stereotypical high school showcased so often on TV and in movies. College was much different. Maybe it's because I went to such a huge metropolitan school, or maybe it was because I was maturing and finally became comfortable with who I was. It was most likely a combination of the two. I then moved back to Boston with a strong sense of self and I look back on my days in high school and wish I had this self-confidence at that age. I would have been way more outgoing and less worried about what other people were thinking about me. It's funny because I look at the current pictures and profiles of all those people from high school and you know what? They ain't that hot! The attractive qualities aren't quite there anymore 10 years out of high school and some of them sound downright dumb. I know I sound completely superficial, but hey, I find it a bit amusing! All those people that I held in such high esteem have fallen off their pedestals and I finally realize that they're just the average run-of-the-mill people. It's quite comforting. All those things that I used to be self-conscious about because I was different are what I see now as my most unique and beautiful qualities. Oh, how teenage angst gets us everytime.

I (DON'T) Love New York

I went to New York City this past weekend to meet up with college friends whom I haven't seen in years. M. and I.,from Sydney and Toronto respectively, were in town for a wedding and D. came up from DC while I went down from Boston. I haven't been with a group of McGill friends since a few year's ago when I went to a wedding in Jersey. It was really nice to see everyone and it really felt like we picked up right where we left off. We were talking about how we were really each other's families for 4 years in Montreal so it's really easy to get right back into the swing of things as if we weren't separated for 6 years. It's nice to feel that kind of comfort and closeness with people.

As wonderful as it was to have quality time with my friends, I just couldn't help but be homesick not even two hours after arriving in the city. For as long as I can remember, I have never liked NYC. It could be because I was somewhat traumatized as a child walking on the streets of Rockefeller Center and getting trampled by crazy New Yorkers. It's like the Running of the Bulls with the locals as the killer animals. I've been back there many times and never really enjoy myself. I always thought the city was too crowded and that the pace was way too fast for my liking.

I stayed in the West Village this time and I liked this area more than any other I've visited in NY. It has a nice neighborhood feel and it's not overly crowded or fast. Everyone seems to have a dog and there are restaurants everywhere you look. If I HAD to ever move to NYC, this would be where I would look (that is, if I had the money to afford it!) I saw two apartments while I was there. One was a friend's studio, which was nice, but it was tiny. Another was D.'s cousin's where I stayed for the weekend. A married couple, their two teenage children, and a 45 lb. pit bull lived in an apartment about the size of my bedroom here in Boston. I couldn't believe how tight it was. I'm majorly claustrophobic so needless to say, I felt a bit cramped. D.'s family was great and I was very appreciative to them for taking me in, but I would and could never live like that for more than a couple of days.

We spent Sunday walking around and browsing the boutiques. If I had the money, I would be so fashionable because the clothes I saw were so stylish. However, I don't have the money so I was only able to window shop. I saw a bikini top for $100. That's not even including the bottom! I realized that if I ever lived in NYC, I wouldn't be able to afford a roof over my head or clothes on my back. I'd be a naked bum. Great huh?

I was so excited when I was finally reunited with him and my babies. I was in heaven when I didn't start sweating right away after taking a shower and that I didn't have to change my clothes in a bathroom the size of a phone booth. The central air was a godsend and having more than 300 square feet of space to relax in was unbelievable. The grass and trees were a breath of fresh air as were the empty streets and silent sidewalks. NYC is definitely the city that never sleeps. I was still walking around at 4:00 AM on Saturday morning and had I not had a watch on, I would've sworn it was 9:00 PM. The streets, restaurants, and bars were bustling with activity. I can't handle that. I need my peace and quiet.

Things I took away from my visit:

1) There's such a thing as "too much" to do in a city
2) I really don't need to live near bars that open past 2:00 AM
3) New Yorkers would be able to live in a cubicle and be totally fine with it as long as it was located in the right neighborhood
4) I need homecooked food at least every other day
5) I can only visit NYC once every few years
6) I am a true Bostonian at heart and plan to stay that way


M., I., and D., it was great to see you. Next time, can we meet up on a tropical island or something? It's much more my pace!!!

Reflections

I went to a retirement dinner last night to honor my aunt as well as 5 other educators with whom she works. As I mingled with people, it dawned on me how unique teachers are. One woman came by and introduced herself to my siblings and me, and she was a little odd. I didn't think too much of it, but my brother and sister were a little weirded out by her. I then explained that within the field of education there are very strange people. I think a lot of teachers dance to their own beat and it makes them all the more fun and interesting to their students.

While listening to the speeches by colleagues honoring the retirees as well as the speeches made by the retirees themselves, I felt as if I was with a very special group of people who I understood completely who also understood me, even though many of them were strangers. I really think it is true that unless you are in the profession, you don't fully understand what it takes to be an educator and how rewarding it really is. I taught for one year and it had such an impact on who I am now. I realize the strength, the caring, the love, the discipline, and the time it takes to touch the lives of so many children. I left teaching purely because of the toll it took on my body, physically and emotionally. Would I ever consider going back? Absolutely. I'm just not at that place right now. Those speeches made me really miss what I had last year in the classroom. I miss those "ah-ha!" moments when a child would look at me and I could see that they finally understood something that they worked so hard to learn. I miss hearing that my students love me and want to be in my class for the rest of their lives. I miss their unassuming and innocent qualities that make me want to cry and laugh at the same time. I miss the belly laughs that I would get numerous times a day because students would either accidentally or purposely do or say something hilarious. I miss seeing those children labeled as "troublemakers" turn around and become leaders in the classroom. I miss watching as quiet and shy children slowly come out of their shells and become confident individuals who feel comfortable enough in my classroom to be proud of who they are.

If I feel like this only after one year of teaching, I can only imagine what those retirees felt like to close such a huge chapter of their lives. They reached a milestone in life and were able to truly be proud of themselves for all of their accomplishments. They not only were able to fulfill their own lives by doing what they loved, but they also touched the lives of all the children they taught as no one else could. Educators are as precious as the children they teach. I tip my hat to them and hope that my one class of students were as touched by me as I was by them.

Common Courtesy

I'm so flabbergasted at the actions of some people. I thought the average person knows how to act in public and with others, but apparently I was wrong. For example, there are a limited number of people that I would feel comfortable sharing a drink with and they have to be pretty good friends. Why on earth would someone I hardly know ask me for a sip of my coffee? Um, let me think about that, NO! That's like asking me if I'd like to drink their backwash or play with their used tissues. Since when was it okay to purposely trade germs with random people?

Another common courtesy that seems to have fallen by the wayside as people have stopped appreciating relaxation and started cramming too much into each day, eventually becoming overly stressed and burnt out, is holding the elevator door open. A couple of months ago I was faced with a crowded elevator and was able to squeeze myself in without causing too much strife. As the door was closing, I saw a woman racing towards it so I automatically reached for the button to keep the doors open for her. Anyone would do that right? You'd think! As soon as I pushed the button, a woman behind me heaved a big sigh and as I turned around, she rolled her eyes at me. What the hell? How does opening an elevator door cause such a bold reaction? Sorry for holding up the ride to your floor by two seconds. Pardon me for being so inconsiderate.

I was talking to Kumar today about how rude some people are on public transportation. I really don't understand how some people don't give up their seats to others who are more in need of a place to sit down. I've seen many business people, men and women alike, shove their faces into their newspapers as pregnant women and elderly folks walk by. We know you see them! Get up for god's sake! If you were carrying an extra 30 pounds in front of you day in and day out, you'd want to sit down too. As for the elderly, geez, would you want someone ignoring your grandparents? Get with the freaking program people. Ever heard of "treat others as you would want to be treated"? I hope some young healthy yuppie does that to you when you're one foot in the grave. Then you'll know what an ass you've been all your life.

There was one time that I had shingles a few years back and I could hardly walk because it affected the nerves running up and down my left leg. I sucked it up and went through my daily routine of taking the train in, working, and then taking the train back home. One day, the train was pretty packed and there was a woman in her 50's standing by me. First of all, she's not old and she wasn't pregnant. She looked healthy enough to me. Anyway, a woman next to me offered this lady her seat. Her reaction? "Oh no, you keep your seat. There are OTHER people on this train who are younger that should be offering their seats." As she said this, her eyes bore into me as if to say, "get up, bitch". I was appalled at her comment. I mean, you can think it, but don't say it! That's being just as rude as the people who don't even offer their seats to begin with. I was about to tell her off saying that I couldn't freaking walk and that maybe she shouldn't just assume things, but I let it go. It wasn't worth my time or effort.

I guess my whole point here is to be considerate to people and learn some common courtesy, especially the ones we practice in our society. Be nice, be polite, and help others. It really does make you feel better about yourself, I promise!

Wedding Bliss

We've been engaged now for over a year and the wedding is finally going to happen in August. I can't believe that it's only a couple of months away. When I first started planning, I figured I wouldn't be too stressed since it's a destination wedding. I mean, I have coordinators up the wazoo helping me out so why stress, right? Wrong. As the weeks and months passed, I realized why all brides turn into crazy wound up b*tches until the wedding day has come and gone. Not only am I constantly thinking about what needs to get done during the day, it keeps me up at night too. It doesn't help that I just had to call one coordinator to tell her that another one that she assigned to me is completely incompetent. There's nothing like an unsatisfied customer to light a fire under them and get them to finally start paying attention to me. I mean, how hard is it to get me a few answers? This woman literally took months to get me one answer. I wasn't going to bombard her with my myriad of questions all at the same time if getting one answer was so difficult for her. Thank goodness someone else is taking over for her to help me with my planning. I wasn't even told that I needed to submit an application for intended marriage until I called to complain. What if I never called? I'd get to Bermuda ready to get married and then be told that we didn't file the right paperwork? Oh, the mess that could've caused!
On a more positive note, I finally lost the few pounds necessary to fit my wedding gown. I just have to make sure not to gain anything between now and the wedding day, which will be difficult considering we'll be on a cruise for a few days before the wedding. Cruise= unlimited food=fat bride. I must practice self-control, yikes. I put on my gown, shoes, and veil for the first time and felt like I was playing dress-up in mommy's closet. I also went and picked out the fabric for my chang saam. My first one will be red and the second will be an orange-gold color. I wasn't looking forward to wearing them considering they're completely unforgiving on a woman's excess baggage, but now that i've seen the beautiful fabrics, I'm excited. I'll just have to make sure to tone up the saggy areas before the banquet in September.
Now if I could only get my invitations finally printed. That's another headache altogether. I need this wedding to be over!!

Baby Mama Drama

Okay, so I don't have a baby and I'm not a mama. I wish that wasn't true though. That's where the drama comes in. Why is it that it seems like people who don't want babies or are terrible parents are the ones that get blessed with their own little bundles of joy? What about the people who try and try and just can't conceive? What about people like me who hear their clocks ticking so loudly that they're practically deaf? Yes, I know that I will eventually have my own little brood of misfits, but I'm becoming very impatient. He says that I'm being silly and upsetting myself unecessarily. He just doesn't understand that I have this void that I'm eager to fill as soon as possible. Some people say that finding a significant other completes their life and that they are finally happy and fulfilled. Others might say that being in the right career or having the right job provides them with the full cup that they desire. Then there is that third group of people. The people in this group, of which I am happy to be a part of, know that they were put on this earth for one reason and one reason only. To bear children and raise them to be independent, happy, healthy, and loving individuals. I've known this about myself since I was tyke. I have always wanted to be a mother, always wanted to feel what it's like to be pregnant, to give birth, to feel that overwhelming love for something that I've created and am responsible for. I want to feel the pride that parents feel when they see their children take their first steps, speak their first words, go to their first day of kindergarten, graduate high school, earn a college degree, fall in love, and then have children of their own. Yes, I am with the man that I love. Yes, I have a job that I love. It's not enough and will never be until I have a family of my own. I'm ready to start the next stage of life and when he finally gives me the green light, I'll be the first one out of the starting gate.

Smacked in the Face at 28

When did I become a full-fledged adult? I was wavering on the line between youth and adulthood for a few years after graduating from college. I was still mistaken for being younger than I was, could wear all types of clothing without worrying about looking stupid, could hang out with the young crowd and not feel old, and sadly, I was still being hit on by adolescent boys with raging hormones who thought I was a hottie. All of a sudden, I realized that none of this stuff happens to me anymore. Yes, i'm still mistaken for being younger than I am, but that's not saying much being Asian and all. We ALL look younger than we are! As for clothing, I have officially stopped wearing certain clothes because they're too "young" for me. I walked into a store at a mall a few months ago and started browsing the racks. Almost instantly, I realized that if I put any item on in that store, I would look completely foolish. Short skirts, midriff baring tops, mini shorts, tee-shirts with cute little logos, you get the picture. Not only were these things young in style, they were also young in size. They were made for people who don't have any curves yet. I have hips goddammit! I held up a pair of shorts and saw that the entire pair would probably fit over one of my thighs. I walked out defeated with head hung low and met up with him to whine about my sudden revelation.
I think my 3 month stint of substitute teaching in a middle/high school also pushed me out of my youth. These kids, some of whom were much bigger than me, all thought of me as an authority figure. Even though I probably listened to the same music as they did and watched the same tv shows, I wasn't "cool" because I was *shiver* an adult. I even heard them refer to me as "that lady".
I had another first a few months ago while paying for something at the register. The boy behind the register thanked me for shopping at their store and then called me Ma'am. MA'AM! I'm not a ma'am, I'm a Miss! Or, so I thought. Oh how I winced in pain. Sadly, this happens more and more these days. I've also begun to feel old at clubs and bars that I used to frequent. Now I don't even bother going. I've begun looking for places that cater to the 30-somethings.
The biggest sign that I'm an adult now is that I actually own my condo and am getting married in August. Married! I'm going to have a husband. I'm going to be a wife. That's a mindf*cker if i've ever heard of one. Logically I know I'm an adult, I mean, I'm 28 for god's sake. There's a disconnect though, between what I know and what I feel. *sigh* Maybe when I hit menopause I'll finally accept my adulthood.

Dangerous Dreams

Over the past couple of years I've graduated from harmless snoring and drooling in my sleep to all out violent episodes. In between was the talking in my sleep stage, which was already annoying enough to him. Now he has to worry about his physical safety. I have never gotten into a physical altercation with anyone and never plan to. I think of myself as a gentle and loving person. Why then, do I constantly have dreams of screaming and fighting? I have some serious pent-up aggression hiding in my subconscious that I need to cleanse out of my system. I have even thrown myself out of the bed full-force while throwing a punch at someone in my dream. As hilarious as that was, it's a little worrisome! I literally flew out of bed and onto the floor. I've also wailed on him in the middle of the night. Once he woke up with little half-moon shapes on his face courtesy of my nails smacking into him. I recently slammed my fist against his pillow and woke both of us up. Luckily, his head was at the other end of the pillow and I hit nothing but feathers. Had his face taken the blow, he could have cried domestic abuse and I wouldn't have been able to refute it. Apparently I talk in my sleep all of the time and I can actually feel myself doing it sometimes. Not only is that annoying to him, I worry about what could come out of my mouth! He says I usually mumble, but that at times I speak in full sentences. I hope I don't say anything incriminating. A couple of nights ago he said I was sniffling away and crying in my sleep. Why can't I have a nice dream for once? One where I'm happy and violence-free? This better not escalate to sleepwalking. That's just creepy.

Caving into the Blogging World

So i'm trying this new (to me) blogging thing. I haven't done anything like this for a while because honestly, I really don't have anything that interesting to say. However, I think it's a great tool to use in order to keep in touch with friends I haven't seen in a while. With that, I'll bid adieu until I actually get people to join with me. I'm not going to write this thing just for myself. Sign up!