And The Search Continues

Would you look at this, 3 postings in less than a week. I have way too much time on my hands. I spend everyday on this damned computer looking for a bunch of damned job openings and sending out my damned cover letter and resume. If only someone other than desperate salespeople from financial companies would start calling me! I posted my resume up on Monster, Careerbuilder, and Hotjobs yesterday and was flooded with emails and calls from financial companies looking for "hot, driven, intelligent" people to join their ranks as a financial advisor. They must be scraping the bottom of the barrel if they're asking ME to advise anyone on financial issues. Note to all of you: Research your financial advisors thoroughly. They could be someone like me. Anyway, It's only mid-week and I feel like it should be the weekend already. I'm going stir-crazy sitting at home all day. I spend all day on the computer and then when I try to relax during the evenings, I feel guilty for not continuing the job search into the wee hours of the night. The stress is so daunting that my sleep has been very disturbed. ME! MY SLEEP! This is only one of the most important and enjoyable parts of my life and now I don't even get that. God, I need a job.

Day Three

It still sucks. I got the axe on Thursday and was able to get through Friday feeling decently okay. Then we got to the weekend and things were alright. I have a very strong feeling that Monday is going to suck. I'm going to wake up tomorrow and realize that everyone else is going about their days at work while I'm sitting on my unemployed ass at home.
This situation is caising me a lot of undue stress. I went to bed early last night due to an oncoming migraine. What a way to spend a Saturday night. Also, I went to the movies yesterday afternoon and went off. Onbe of my biggest pet peeves is being disturbed by inconsiderate patrons in the same theater as I'm in. Well, there was a bunch of teenage girls at the front of the theater just yakking away for the first half of the movie. I got so pissed off that before I even knew it,I yelled to them to SHUT THE FUCK UP! I was taken aback by my own bitchiness for a milisecond, until thye rest of the theater started clapping and cheering for me. One guy even said that that incident was better than the movie itself. All I have to say about this is that it's not a good idea to piss me the fuck off when I'm down on my luck.Period.

What the Motherf*ck!

I'm sitting here at the computer still reeling from the shock I received this morning. Out of the blue, the department decides to lay off 30% of its employees. Guess who was one of the lucky people to get axed...me! Isn't that just fantastic news? Ugh. I was called into an exec's office this morning only to be told this very upsetting news. And if that wasn't enough, he added, "so basically today is your last day." Um, stick a nail in the coffin why don't you! Geez. Apparently the security desk downstairs had a list of all the people allowed out of the building with boxes today so if I were to need to pack my stuff, he told me I might be stopped by security so I should give them my name and it'd be fine. Thanks...I guess. Oh yeah, I can't forget the cab voucher they gave to me for my ride home. So generous.
Everything about the situation is weird. 1) We never got even a hint of a warning that this was going to take place. 2) My direct supervisor was in the dark and I had to tell HER that I was let go. WTF is up with that? Just a tad strange, no? 3)I have no idea how Corporate chose people to lay off. I've only been working there a little over a year and I was shocked. Imagine the surprise to people who have been working there for decades? Yes, they too were on the chopping block. I don't get it. I don't think anyone does. Stupid corporate mergers. Damn them.
Anyway, after my initial response of crying and hyperventilating was over, I proceeded to tell my colleagues. I think that's the worst part of all. Yes, I love my job and yes I finally found the career for me, but shit, what am I going to do without all my friends at work?! I had such a blast there everyday because the atmosphere was always full of friendliness and fun. Even if I find another job, there's no guarantee that I'll find a group of people as wonderful as the ones I had to leave. I mean, even with this awful news, I was able to leave with a smile on my face because I can't help but smile when I'm around them.
This just sucks. It sucks balls. It sucks big balls. Did you know that this sucks?